Thoughts on perfectionistic grandiosity, and the infection of super guru success people, vs. a grounded vision of progress. I have two metaphors: climbing a mountain path, and planting 3 different seeds.
I wanted to share some realizations. I had this past week about perfectionistic grandiosity, I listened to the smart, passive income podcast the other day. And pat Flynn had this woman on named Dorie Clark who wrote a book called The Long Game. And it was a really nice antidote to the customary.
Rah, you can have it all instantly. Thing that can pervade the world of internet sort of business training and things like that. And she had a lot of interesting thoughts about how to get a perspective on what it’s going to take. And it kind of shifted my perspective in a way where I realized I was still.
A little bit inside this perfectionistic grandiosity that said, oh, if you’re not having this giant mega super result instantaneously than maybe there’s something wrong with what you’re doing. And now I think with the work I’m doing with Catherine. I, I feel beyond that in some ways and anchored into a thing that’s deeper and more meaningful and rich, and I feel dedicated to it, but I could still see these vestiges of perfectionistic grandiosity.
And I came up with a couple of interesting metaphors and the first one is a mountain metaphor. For years. I think what I was doing was I really, really, really wanted to climb this mountain, you know, and it, it entrepreneurial mountain, but you know, a mountain of creating something valuable and wonderful and great.
And I’m still climbing. Right. But what I saw metaphorically was that I would be down in the village at the foothills of this, this mountain hanging out. Drinking a beer thinking about, maybe I should really climb that mountain. And then finally I’d summon up the courage and the Gusto and kind of explore the foothills there and I’d see a pathway.
Wow. There’s a pathway at the mountain. I think that might go all the way up to the top. I think it does. I want to climb this mountain and get all outfitted ready, excited, and start trudging up the map. Full of VIM and vigor and enthusiasm. And I’d be trudging up this metaphorical mountain, trying a few things, reaching out, doing some free workshops, webinars, videos here and there, talking to people, tweaking out my website a little bit.
So I get, get up a little bit, little bit of a ways up the smell. Half a mile. I don’t know, a mile who knows of this big, big mountain. And I would have some real wins, you know, like I would get consulting clients or I would get coaching clients, or I would get clients for my web business that were great.
That were where I wanted to morph it more into a whole consulting package. And wow. It’s starting to happen. You know, and then all of a sudden I’d hit a Boulder. It hit something. I don’t even know what, but I think part of it was the feeling that, oh yeah, I got a Quincy client or two or, yeah, I guess I had a little win, but you know, it’s not big enough.
It’s not grand enough. You know, it’s not grandiose enough. I don’t know. It may be, it’s not what I thought it was going to be. I’m not exactly sure what the discouragement was. I’m really not, but then I would kind of wander back down the mountain, get distracted land back in the village again, you know, and sip some beers for a while and think about going into the mountain again, maybe after a while, wander up into the foothills and find another trail.
And then get all excited and go up that trail. Go with that trail. Go up. That trail, hit a Boulder, have a few little starting successes. I shouldn’t even say little because they were probably big for where it was at the time. And I did this over and over again, up this one trail and then back down up another trail and then back down up another trail, then back down, back down to the village.
And of course, what I realized the other day was that this is a great way to put all this effort in, to climbing a mountain and never actually get anywhere up the mountain because you’ve expended it all going up different parents, even though it was really going up the same mountain. So that’s what I saw.
And I think Dorie Clark put me in a nice mindset to realize, you know, we’re building a cathedral here and here’s another brick or that expression bird by bird. You know, you, you build it and you be excited about this next brick of the building. You’re building. Maybe it doesn’t have to be as big as a cathedral.
What kind of building would you like to build, but be excited and be honored and thrilled about the next brick, because it’s a result of your efforts and it was perfectly appropriate and exciting and wonderful for this stage that you’re in. And this led me to my next analogy. The other analogy about three sprouts or three seeds.
I came upon this one, because Pat Flynn said that Dorie Clark has ways of thinking about whether or not the path you’re on is a path that you should keep going on and you just need to keep going or a path that’s really not going to go anywhere. And as soon as he said that I flashed and I realized, oh my gosh, there’s all kinds of easy way.
To tell whether the path you’re going on is a good path or not a good path. And of course you can’t be sure, but there are so many indicators that you can see. So let’s just say, or you’re trying to grow a big giant Oak tree and you have these, you know, these little acorns, I guess they would be acorns, right.
Or it’d be three seeds. Okay. So one kind of seed you plant and. You have to have some faith at first and water and water for days, maybe even weeks before you start to see a little tiny sprout come out. But once you see the sprout come out, you can start to say, oh, oh, this, this looks promising. And this definitely is a, it looks like an Oak sprout, I think.
And it’s got energy and it looks healthy and I have energy for it. This is the kind of tree I’d like to see grow in my back here. This is the kind of tree I want to flourish in my backyard. And I can imagine wanting to give this life for many years to come. So if the thing you’re putting your heart into scenes, that way, if you have energy for it, that feels like it could keep flowing for years to come, then you’re in a good place.
And you just have to recognize that if it’s a little sprout or a little sapling, That success for that little sapling is that it’s healthy and growing and taking in nutrients. And the winds for that little sapling are not going to look like the winds for a big tree. And you’ve got to be excited. You know, the way a little toddler is excited when they make a new discovery or a baby is excited when he or she learns to Ark.
So then you have this other seed and you plant it and water it and water it and water it. And nothing comes out. It’s, it’s a dead seed. So, you know, if you see, nobody seems to have any energy for your project and you really have put it out there and there just doesn’t seem to be a lot of momentum or energy and internally for it, they may be a dead seed.
And then of course the last type of seed would be a weed. You thought it was an Oak tree seed and acorn, but it turned out to be there now in this part of the country, we would have Acacia trees. That would be like a weed tree that would fill out a yard, you know? And for you that weed might even be a high paying job for some people, or, but if it’s a thing that they really didn’t want to be doing and.
Energy away and water away and resources away from where they really want it to be. So that would be a weed, but you really can’t hell if you look and see where your energy is and that’s something you can gauge, you really can gauge the trajectory and the momentum and the energy you have for this thinking of the long haul of growing this tree.
But so somehow it just gave me the. More grounded perspective that every video that I make, every podcast thing that I make or anything is another wonderful brick in this building that I’m building. And I sort of felt my feet on the ground.